The Attempt and Not the Deed Confounds Us
by RingOfTheShire
Summary: When Rina Oswald joins the Survey Corps, she expected just the typical routine of risking your life. What she didn't expect, however, was to catch the attention of the famous Captain Levi, humanities strongest soldier. Can she prove her worth? Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note: Hello! This is my first Attack on Titan fanfiction so fingers crossed you guys will like it. It is going to be a bit slow at first whilst I introduce everything, but hopefully you will stick around to see it develop further. It features an OC of mine, Rina Oswald. Anyway, please read and I hope you enjoy it! :)**

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Chapter One - Prologue.

Rina Oswald, aged eighteen. Height, five foot one, from the Trost district. That was what I told the soldier when I was signing up for military training, anyway. That was five years ago, making me twenty three now. I graduated as part of the top ten, excelling in knowledge and fast in the physical exercises. The factor that led me to join training was partly because it has always been difficult to contain my curiosity about the outside world: the world outside these walls we are confined in. My life before the training wasn't the best, more like hell, but that's a story for another time. The idea of leaving my old life behind and starting anew appealed to me. I was a coward, I knew that, to run away and leave my problems behind but what else could I do? The curiosity I had contained as a child had never left - only heightened. So when training had ended - there was only one section I could pick, one that allowed me to see the outside world: the Survey Corps.

The majority of people viewed them as heroes, valiant soldiers willing and ready to give up their lives in a heart beat. And why not? It was a good cause. The training wasn't easy, it required hard work and determination that most people lacked; thinking they could breeze through it and join the military police, where they could drink and gamble. But one of the hardest parts about it was getting along with somebody. Most were people who lazed about, thinking they could scrape by, and the rest were even worse. They were loud and boastful, shouting about how many Titans they were going to kill. So where did that place me then? I don't know, and that is my point exactly - I never really fitted in. It was a relief to find that my bunk mate, Nadia, didn't quite seem to it into both categories either. We were friends through sharing a cabin which developed to us sitting together at lunch and scoffing at everyone who thought they were better than others.

At first, Nadia had her hearts set on the military police, wanting to be place closer to home. I guess I couldn't really blame her. She had a family who loved her and she didn't want to give that up. But, for me? I had no one. No one who would stop me risking my life. That is why I was entirely surprised to find out that Nadia had decided to join me in the Survey Corps, refusing to leave me on my own. We both trained hard to enter and now, two weeks in, I can say that so far, I do not regret a thing.

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**Okay. so there it is, my first chapter! I hope you enjoyed it and yes, I know it is really slow, but this chapter was mainly about introducing my OC. Sorry about the lack of my personal favourite, Levi. But he is in the next chapter!**

**Please review, it would mean a lot to me :)**

**Ellie x**


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note: Yes, my second chapter is finally up! I've introduced Levi in this chapter to make up for the lack of him in the last on, sorry about that! I did have to rush copying this up so hopefully there are not too many errors. Apologies if there is. Anyway, please read and enjoy!**

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The first two weeks after my decision to join the training corps were intense. Every morning we were made to spar with our partners in the training fields and every night I went to bed with fresh bruises forming. Currently we were being made to run laps on the gigantic running track by our Squad Leader. When the instruction was given, everyone grumbled under their breath but I felt like laughing; finally something I could do! Back home, whenever things got rough, I would run for miles, not caring where my feet would take me - only caring about the fresh wind on my face and the freedom I felt after being confined for so long. After my third lap on the track, I couldn't help slowing down, fatigue creeping upon me. Instead of stopping altogether, I pushed myself further, noticing it was me, Nadia and another boy by the name of Alexander in the lead- whom Nadia happened to have a crush on.

"Okay, stop"! The Squad Leader blew his whistle and I slowed to a jog, allowing Nadia to catch up with me until we both eventually stopped. Clutched over and panting for breath, Nadia turned towards me.

"Damn... I haven't... felt... this good... in ages." She exclaimed, still gasping for breath. I was about to nod in agreement when the Squad Leader opened his mouth. We stood up straighter in acknowledgement.

"Listen up you bunch of sorry idiots! This was mediocre at best but do you think this is good enough for when you're outside these walls? You will be as good as dead! Sort yourselves out soldiers and prove to me you're not worthless!" He stopped shouting, opting to glare at all of us instead. When his eyes joined mine, I gulped, not daring to make a noise that would disrupt the silence.

"Class dismissed!"

* * *

Occupying a bench in the cafeteria, I picked at my food - not feeling hungry - whilst listening to Nadia complain.

"That was fucking intense! I mean seriously, I personally thought we did extremely well considering we haven't had a track that huge to run on in ages - Rina? Are you OK?"

I snapped my head up, surprised at the mention of my name. I smiled apologetically at the girl across from me who looked at me with worried eyes. "I'm fine, just a bit worn out from training. Honestly." I reassured her, hoping not to worry her with my troubles - especially since they're just stupid thoughts about having to use the maneuver gear for the first time tomorrow. She opened her mouth to reply when a voice came from the end of our table.

"Do you mind if I sit here?" We glanced up, seeing the man from earlier who had kept pace with us. Alexander, I think his name was. I peered across from me, seeing a light blush forming on Nadia's cheeks.

"Sure!" I told him whilst smiling, "you can have my seat."

"Are you sure?" He asked for confirmation. I looked at Nadia, seeing her practically drooling over the boy in front of her. But when her eyes snapped up to meet mine, she seemed conflicted and I knew she still wanted to make sure that I was alright.

"Yeah," I told him, "I wasn't really hungry anyway, I guess I'll see you back in our cabin, Nadia?" I stood up, taking my plate with me before walking away and placing it on the counter to be cleaned. When I was about to exit the double doors, I glanced back, seeing the two in deep conversation and Nadia giggling. As I exited into the hallway, I sighed and shook my head, but couldn't stop the small smile forming on my face. I was happy for her and besides, if she was to have a crush on someone, it could have been worse. I walked down the hallway, too deep in thought to notice where I was going until suddenly I was abruptly knocked to the ground, pain stinging my already sore legs.

"Tch. Watch where you're going, brat." Oh shit. I knew that voice. Startled, I looked up quickly to see the face of none other than Squad Leader Lance Corporal Levi, humanities strongest soldier. I gulped inaudibly, quickly raising my arms into a salute.

"H...Heichou!" I called out of surprise. His steel grey eyes brushed over my body, still noticing I was on the floor. I couldn't stop the furious blush that forced itself onto my face, tinting it red. He thrust his hand out in front of me, palm open. I faltered, staring at it in confusion, surely he didn't mean for me to take it?

"Tch," he said again, waving his hand in front of my face. "Get up you shithead, I have places to be."

Wincing slightly at his harsh choice of words, I took my hand in his, allowing him to pull me up. There are some thing you expect about someone and some hings that can take you by surprise. But what shocked me the most about this whole ordeal was how soft his hands were. Yes, his fingertips were calloused from years of using the maneuver gear, but the rest was soft, sending a tingling sensation down my spine. As quick as I felt the warmth of his hand on mine, it was gone and he was striding down the hallway.

_Well, that was definitely strange_. I mumbled to myself before finally getting to my room and into bed. But, as my luck would have it, sleep didn't appear onto come easily. I had too many thoughts flitting around in my head, each as important as the next. First, I thought about the strange coincidence that had just occurred. I had heard so many awful things about him, even having experienced a few myself. In the first few weeks of staying here, I had found myself lost after curfew and found myself on kitchen duty for a week. But today, I had bumped into him and here he was extending his hand to me, helping me up? It just didn't fit the descriptions people had of him. My stomach churned as I thought about what had been bothering me today at lunch. We were trying the maneuver gear for the fist time tomorrow and that was a scary thought, many things could go wrong. Next, I couldn't help but think about Nadia and if she was getting on well with Alexander. In a way I had always felt bad for Nadia. I wasn't the easiest person to talk to at times, with my lack of social skills around other people. I think it is because of this that she never made any other friends - because of me. I sighed and rolled over, trying to leave all traces of bad thoughts outside of my head before I finally succumbed to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for those who favourited and followed, it really means a lot! Also, I did notice a few spelling mistakes in my last chapter which I have now edited - that is what you get for rushing it I suppose. Anyway, in order to make up for it, this chapter is super lengthy, with up to 3,000 words! I can't believe I wrote so much, I was actually going to write more but I thought I should break it up into two.**

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The next morning I woke up bright and early to the sound of repetitive knocking on my door. I groaned, burrowing my face into the pillow, praying that the person would person would eventually leave. Of course, luck was clearly not on my side today.

"Come on Rina! If you're late to breakfast you get served the crappy cold food!"

I sighed and crawled out of bed, knowing now that there was no chance of sleeping in, god damn Nadia and her love for food. I sluggishly walked over towards the door and pulled it open, revealing an already awake and fresh looking Nadia. Before I could even say anything, she had pushed her way into my room and collapsed onto my messy, unmade bed.

"Oh my goodness, you're not even dressed yet? Wait - did I just wake you up?" I reluctantly nodded, just now realising how late I must have slept in. Oh crap. "Seriously? But you're usually almost always the first one up!"

That was true, the majority of time I was always so tired from training that I decided to go to bed early. Because of that, I was always up early and ready before anyone else had woken up. Yawning, I moved over to my table and picked up the folded clothes I had placed there the night before. Without asking Nadia to leave, I turned my back and undressed. "I know, sorry, I just had a lot of things on my mind, is all." I replied, suddenly thinking about what had bothered me. Today we were trying the maneuver gear for the first time. My stomach churned in revolt - suddenly I didn't feel so hungry anymore. Shaking my head, I buttoned my blouse and quickly shoved on my trousers. Without wasting time, I threw on my jacket and located my boots by the door, shoving each foot in and successfully intertwined the laces. I wandered into the bathroom and gave myself a quick once over in the mirror before sighing. The bags under my eyes showed my lack of sleep and my matted hair just proved further how much I must have tossed and turned in the night. Grabbing my brush off the stand, I brutally forced it through my hair, wincing at every knot I pulled out.

"Rina, are you even listening to me?"

I jumped in surprise, so caught up over my appearance that I forgot that there was someone else in the room. I placed the brush where it belonged and quickly joined Nadia in the bedroom we shared. "I'm sorry, what was that?"

Nadia shook her head and sighed, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Nevermind. Come on, you look decent enough and besides, I need to tell you about what happened last night!"

The entire journey to the dining hall I was filled in all about the events that occurred between Nadia and Alexander last night. Apparently he was originally from somewhere inside Wall Sina and had a little sister which prompted Nadia to coo "isn't that adorable?" I sighed and rolled my eyes, listening to her talk about how irrevocably in love she is with him after only talking to each other once. I was happy for her though, he seemed nice enough. When we reached the doors they were abruptly pulled open from the inside, prompting me and Nadia to swiftly move to the side, allowing whoever it was to come through. Last nights memories came rushing back to me as I saw who it was on the other side - the Lance Corporal. It was then that I realised Nadia was still rambling on about her lover. Rolling my eyes at her obliviousness I raised my arm into a salute, hoping that I wasn't blushing.

"Oswald." He nodded in acknowledgement. As soon as he spoke, Nadia stopped talking and fumbled over her words, clearly embarrassed.

"S...Sir!" She frantically called out, trying to hide her embarrassment. He barely glanced at her, focusing instead on me.

"Messy unkempt hair and your top button not even done up properly? Tch, you're a soldier, set an example - maybe you should get up earlier." He approached me and, before I could even move away, he was smoothing out my collar of my shirt. If possible, my face grew even hotter as I realised the proximity between us two. I kept my gaze down on the floor, trying not to fidget or flinch. Finally he stepped away, satisfied with the straightness of my collar. "You ought to be taught a lesson, Oswald." Was the last thing he said before he sauntered down the hallway and out of sight.

I let out a breath I didn't realise I had been holding and Nadia let out a shaky laugh. We grabbed our breakfast and found a seat at an empty table. As I chewed on my food, Nadia opened her mouth to speak. "Okay, are we going to ignore that? Because that was seriously scary."

I shrugged, "he's an idiot! What kind of captain is he supposed to be? I bumped into him yesterday and he was exactly the same - cold hearted." I shoveled the same cold porridge into my mouth.

"You bumped into him yesterday? You didn't tell me!"

"I didn't think it was important?" I phrased it like a question, unsure if it was news or not.

"Oh, nevermind!" Nadia glanced at the clock, "oh, shoot - we're going to be late!" I realised she was right and quickly finished off my breakfast

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When we both arrived at the training field, Alexander quickly waved us over. He looked ecstatic to see Nadia again and was even bold enough to give her a quick hug.

"Are you excited for today, Rina?" Alexander asked me, making polite conversation. I looked in front of me and saw a table lined up with shiny, silver maneuver gear. My heart leaped into my throat and my airway became constricted as I felt my stomach squeeze. I looked back at Alexander, eyes wide with fear. "N..no." I managed to choke out. Nadia put her arm around my shoulders, trying to give me some comfort.

"What is it that you're scared of?" She asked me. I glanced at the huge metal machine on the table and tried to establish just why I was so frightened. I have never been afraid of heights, in fact, just like running - I like the freedom of being in the air and feeling the fresh wind. No, I knew it wasn't that. I was frightened of failing. Of not being able to hold myself up in the air because if that happened, then what was left for me? There would be no place for me in the Scout regiment. Back in training we had balanced with the gear on and I'll admit, I wasn't the best, but after the first few tries of me falling flat on my face I finally got it. But what if that was a fluke? What if that was just once and this gear was going to weigh me down? I looked back at Nadia, realising she needed an answer.

"I don't know." I replied simply, not wanting her to be worried. Before she could elaborate on it further, our commander had arrived and we had to choose the right gear that fitted us perfectly. I went for a smaller looking one, right on the edge of the table and quickly strapped it around my waist. It was a bit loose so I adjusted the straps, making sure it fitted perfectly on my hips.

"Okay, listen up idiots!" Our commander shouted - how lovely. The field fell silent. "This piece of gear is one of the most important things you will need outside these walls. It allows you to become elevated, giving you the perfect opportunity to strike a Titan. You will need to become accustomed to the feel of these, as they will essentially become a part of you. It should be one of your top priorities that, when you're outside of these walls - you make sure to never become separated with it." I listened intently, taking in every word he spoke.

"Maneuver gear runs on gas, which is why it is important that you must never waste it as gas isn't an unlimited supply outside the walls. You may feel like you want to go as fast as it allows but that is one thing you mustn't do. You must slow yourself down; pace yourself. This way, if you are in a situation where you cannot kill the Titan for whatever reason, you should have enough gas left to evade it as fast as you can."

"Now, as I am sure you're all eager, I need to explain how this gear works and assess just how well you use it." My heart thumped - we were being assessed? Nadia saw the fear on my face and squeezed my hand. I relaxed, grateful for her presence. "At the back of the gear you are using, there is an extractor fan. When you are in the air, this fan propels you forward, allowing you to move and not fall. On the side of it, there should be a trigger on top of the hilt of the swords." He waited whilst everyone fumbled with the gear, their thumbs now hovering over the top. "Got it? Right now when you press down the grappling hooks should shoot out from which they grab onto a target. The force alone from that is enough to lift you off your feet and propel you into the air. It will happen very suddenly, so the first few times it will hurt until you get used to the air being knocked right out of you. Wherever you land, whether it be a tree trunk or the side of a building, it is important to have your legs shoulder width apart and legs kicked out, making sure you land without breaking a bone."

Suddenly I felt like being sick, there was so much to remember and I knew for sure I would never get the landing right, God help my poor bones that will most likely be soon to be broken. Looking around at the faces of my team members, I realised I wasn't the only one afraid. There were a few other people looking weary, shifting from one foot to the other. Rotating on my feet, I quickly turned back around to face my commander. I raised my jaw high and clenched my teeth. _I didn't graduate in the Top Ten for nothing, I have potential, _I thought to myself suddenly, determination setting in.

"In this forest we have set up some wooden titans. It is your job to race through, using teamwork, and cut down as many as you can, you may begin."

Everyone jogged towards the opening of the forest, the heavy gear banging against our sides. The commander was right - it would take time to get used to it. As I got closer, I located the nearest tree and grabbed the hilt of my swords. Some of my teammates had set off already and, although they had a shaky landing, they seemed to master it perfectly. _Okay, _I thought, _lets go!_

I jammed my thumbs down on the button and suddenly I was lurched off my feet, the breath being forced out of my lungs. For a moment I panicked as I was flying through the air, the wind slapping me brutally against the face; stinging. Before I knew it, the tree was right in front of me and I couldn't part my legs in time to ensure a safe landing. I hit the tree with a violent force and fell down the the branch below, landing there with a soft _oof! _

Okay, so that didn't go as planned. I hoisted myself up so I was standing on the branch. I groaned at the aching in my limbs although I couldn't say I was surprised. I repeated the same procedure but this time I was prepared for the feeling. When I saw the next tree approaching my legs were already shoulder width apart and this time I landed with a soft delicacy. For the next hour I sped through the forest, helping my teammates cut down the mechanical Titans and, at times, although I knew this was bad, I secretly stole a few kills for myself, thus making my kill count forty five.

When the commander blew his whistle, we all regrouped at the opening of the forest, out of breath but bursting with energy.

"Not bad," he told us, "I expect improvements for next time though." And with that, he walked away, leaving us to put away the gear. I met up with Nadia and Alexander as we walked back to the dining hall for dinner.

"God, what a jerk," Nadia muttered, "I don't know about you guys, but I totally owned it!"

Alexander smiled at her. "I know you did, I saw you - you did great. How did you do Rina?"

Feeling proud, I couldn't help but boast a bit either. "It was exhilarating, all of my fears were for naught! I felt free and killing all of the fake Titans made me feel happy, although, I still need to practice my landing a bit." I admitted.

Alexander whirled to face me, making Nadia and I halt in our places. "Why don't we practice again - to make sure we get it perfect?"

I laughed at the idea. "What, now? I don't know if you noticed but we've just put all the maneuver gear away and I am starving." Nadia nodded in agreement.

"No, not now!" He exclaimed before lowering his voice to a whisper, "but we could do it at night." I paused, considering his words for a moment.

"Uh, Alexander sweetie, I don't know if you noticed, but there is a curfew!" Nadia pointed out.

"No, I know a secret way, I promise! There is absolutely zero chance we should get caught." He informed us, practically glowing with his excitement. "Count me out." Nadia told him.

I examined his face, looking for even the smallest detection that he was joking.

"Count me in."

* * *

That night, after much reluctance to let me do it on Nadia's part, I managed to sneak out of our cabin after she fell asleep. Using the route that Alexander told me about - which should get me there undetected - I navigated my way in the dark before finally arriving.

"Boo."

Instinctively, I quickly whirled around, hands raised in defense, ready to apologise about being out after curfew. The silhouette chuckled slightly.

"Relax, it's just me."

"Alexander, you jerk! I told him before reaching over and punching him in the arm. He laughed again before handing me my maneuver gear. I glanced around nervously, checking to see if anyone was lurking about.

"Don't worry," Alexander said, "I scoped the place out first, there is no one around, we just have to be extra quiet." I nodded. I didn't have any issue with being quiett seeing as I was small which equated to me being fast and agile. I slipped on the gear and adjusted the straps.

"Race you!" Was all I said before I lurched myself forward and pressed both buttons. Before long I was flying from tree trunk to tree trunk, improving my landing each time. The more used to the gear we got, the faster we became but Alexander could never quite catch up to me.

"I bet you regret teasing me about being small now," I called to him from in front, where he was racing to catch up. He let out a throaty laugh.

"You wish!"

Eventually we both became too tired to continue and found a thick tree branch to settle on whilst we cooled down. I sat there panting whilst Alexander cradled his sprained wrist to his arm. I laughed at him, "you shouldn't have tried to reach out for me when I was still moving!"

"Oh, so you're going to blame me for this?" He asked, laughing along with me.

"Of course, it is your fault after all." We sat in silence for a while, catching our breath and listening to the sound of the leaves rustling in the wind. "You and Nadia would make a good couple." I spoke after a while.

"Wh...What! I... we're just friends!" He spluttered. I smiled at him and swung down from the branch, putting my gear away. "She deserves someone like you, someone nice."

"I... thanks." He finally said. I stood there and realised just how lucky Nadia was, he was a nice guy.

"See you tomorrow." I told him before making my way back to the cabin, careful as to not make a sound. I clambered up the porch steps, movements slow from the aching in my limbs. When I reached my door, I was about to slowly open it when a deep voice sounded behind me, breaking the silence of the dark night.

"You're out after curfew."

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**Oooooh, cliffhanger! Although I'm presuming we all know who that is. Also, I would just like to say, considering the fact that I am English, there will be some words that are spelt differently to the way it is in other countries. I'm sorry if this bothers you. Anyway, please review as it would make me super happy and stay tuned for the next chapter!**


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